“If your hand causes you to stumble, cut it off; it is better for you to enter life crippled, than, having your two hands, to go into hell, into the unquenchable fire.”

-Mark 9:43, The Holy Bible

Max took a long drag of her cigarette, hand quivering as she fought through her own thoughts, wanting to forget the beach and that all-too-perfect existence that was cruelly ripped away from her. She looked towards the early morning sky, recalling her past, and released an airy breath of smoke. Two moons once seemed to split above as multiple realities bumped against each other the night of the Vortex Club party. She hated thinking about that time now, as it reminded her of what she had to endure in the darkroom. However, discerning the difference between what was real and what was fake, helped to ground her in truth.

“There is a dark stain on my soul, Dearie.” The Voodoo Man sighed, breaking Max away from her thoughts. He never dropped eye contact as he spoke. “It cannot be removed. I will spare you the details, but trust me, I have tried to rid myself of this darkness many times. All it does is backfire and I get pulled under again.”

“Oh, shut the fuck up! I can never trust you!” Max blurted, shooting to her feet and leaning forward. “I don’t give a shit about you or anything you say. The sound of your voice just pisses me off.” The last couple of years had certainly hardened her a bit, but she only felt this kind of anger once. It began with terror and ended up twisting into hatred, telling her former teacher to ‘eat shit and die’.

“Be careful, Max. If he can create false realities, who knows what he’s capable of doing.” Chloe’s words acted as a sort of pacifier, calming Max’s anger and filling her heart.

I really don’t care anymore. Fuck this guy… I-I miss you so much, Chloe. 

The man cleared his throat. “You miss her, yes?”

“Voodoo Man, Bokor, or whatever your name is… you can’t fucking imagine what it’s like to fly without your pilot,” Max began. “Or pretend to fly, at least. The only thing keeping me from taking a nosedive is a tiny sliver of hope that I might eventually find my pilot again. So yeah, spare me your bullshit.”

“Be smart, Max. He seems to be at war with himself, lamenting and shit. Last night, he was talking about helping you. He showed you that fake reality, and now he says there’s no purpose behind it? He’s abso-fucking-lutely playing some sort of game. But, why?” 

“My journey is not unlike your own, in some ways. Please, Max sit with me once more.” He motioned to the seat across from him and bobbed his head. “You are still my guest here. I have given you no reason to, but you have to trust me. That much is true.”

Max flicked her fingers to dispose of her cigarette’s ashes. She took one final drag then tossed the butt in the burn barrel to her side. She considered Chloe’s words about being smarter and tried to be more intentional with her words.

“Are you actually going to help me? I don’t care if you have to satisfy your fucked up urges first. I’m ready for anything you can deal out.” She puffed her chest to exude confidence. “Last night, you were talking about giving me my rewind back. Was that all bullshit just so you could torture me? Actually, I’m not even sure you have the power to help me. Some fucking pathetic Bokor you are.”

The man finally broke eye contact, cutting his eyes left then right. He huffed as he twisted his body away.

Max sat and crossed her legs, hands folded in her lap on top of her pants.

Gotta appear assertive, Max. 

After the man shifted back around, Max noticed his face had soured, features drooping as if he had recently received bad news. “Have you ever thought you might be more caught up in the IDEA of Chloe than of Chloe herself? Maybe you have romanticized something that is not actually fact. Humans do that sometimes.”

“I love her. It’s more than just some… idea.”

“Have you ever heard of Stockholm Syndrome, Photographer?”

Suddenly, a memory bubbled up from the time she spent in her nightmare before finally making it out and up to the lighthouse cliff. Another version of herself, her subconscious, asked her a similar question.

“Unfortunately, I have.” Max rolled her eyes. “That’s not the first time I’ve heard that.”

“Yes, I know. I am not saying you do not love your blue-haired friend. I know you do, obviously. At least you think you do. How many times did she abuse you and your powers when you two reconnected? She used you with no concern for your safety.”

“Yeah, you’re right, Max. Fuck him!” 

“You’re twisting what happened, Bokor. I hurt her in the past, no doubt about it. I wasn’t there for her when she needed me. After five years apart, we were finally back together. She had abandonment issues as well as unresolved grief– I know that now. She loved me with all of her heart, and Chloe would never purposely hurt me.”

“From what I can see, Child, she played with your powers so much it started ripping your mind apart. You had to rewind a lot. Blood was pouring from your nose, and she was the cause of it.” He tilted his head and squinted his eyes. “Do you deny that?” His eyebrows were raised, and Max thought he suddenly looked pompous and mean.

She shook her head. “No. She was overjoyed to have me back, that’s all! She only wanted to play with me like we used to do when we were kids. We were finally back in action. Chloe had no idea that it was hurting me. Don’t you dare blame her!”

“Like I said, Stockholm Syndrome. Now you are making excuses for the abuse she put you through. Classic.” The man snickered to himself.

“Max, he’s turning this shit around on you. You have to ignore it and regain control.” 

She thought for a moment then spoke. “This is my journey, Voodoo Man. I don’t know a whole lot, but I know Chloe and I are soulmates through space and time. We are connected at levels I don’t even understand. We were working through our baggage and falling in love with each other before that fucking choice on the cliff. Let me decide how to move forward with my life. Help me!”

The green-eyed man stood and paced towards the back fence, fallen pine needles crunching beneath his boots. After a moment, he returned to where Max was located. “Okay. You have proven to me that you can handle what comes next. I will not lie; I have been watching you for some time. Then, I saw you face-to-face yesterday and figured you would not make it after I showed you your perfect scenario. Others have perished afterwards. Your spirit is not brittle, Max. You are very strong.”

“Handle what comes next?” Max asked, genuinely confused by the man’s words.

Others? 

“I mentioned last night I once had a daughter. I neglected her in search of this power. It is my single biggest regret. I shall redeem myself now, with you. Just know, I can point you in the right direction, but you have to find your own way out. I cannot do that for you.”

“What the hell are you talking about?”

“You still have my potion coursing through your veins, so I have control when I want… for now. See, a lot of people think dark magic calls upon a spiritual evilness to function. Really, it is more a matter of dark science, if you will. I did not lie to you, Max. I can help you out of your own personal hell. To do that, you will have to let go. Not of Chloe– I know that is impossible. You have to let go of your idea of reality. Your role to play in all of this is not what you think. And it will not be the role you want to play, that is for certain. But, if you think you are ready, I can send you on one final journey. If you survive, your partner in time will too. I know you do not want to at this point, but you have to trust me.”

“So, that other reality WAS a test? Goddamnit!” 

Do I just trust him? How can I?! I mean, I was in heaven just a few moments ago. He took that from me! From us! 

“We both know what you’re gonna choose, Max. Just do it. I’ll always be here with you. That’s my promise.” 

Max meandered several steps away.

With dawn slowly causing the morning sky to begin lightening, she could see more of the yard than before. It was junky. Random metal shards, broken glass, and rubber tire pieces littered the area. A rusted, chain-link fence surrounded the backyard property. Entire sections had fallen, yet it seemed to be in fairly decent shape.

During her long trek to the Voodoo Man’s cabin, she didn’t realize how far up in altitude she had climbed. She recalled wondering if her bike would make it up the steep, dense foothills. The fog had let up a little, as well. From their position, she could see for miles through the forest and down through the valley. To say they were in the middle of nowhere would be a vast understatement.

Max lost contact with everyone she once called ‘friends’ during her search the last couple of years. Nothing else mattered to her. Even her parents had no idea where she was headed after she departed from their house. She knew they both loved her, but they understood that letting her leave on her own was the only way for her to “find healing”, as her mother put it.

As Max turned back around and approached the man, still sitting in his chair, she felt a renewed sense of purpose. Maybe the Voodoo Man would never have pure intentions of helping her, but she knew he was still her final hope. She intended to put everything she had into this final piece of the puzzle to get her rewind back. To get CHLOE back.

“Let’s play,” Max affirmed, sitting down across from the Bokor. “I’m ready for whatever you’ve got.”

The man smiled. “That was always going to be your decision, yes?”

Max assertively nodded.

“If you make it through, your role will reconnect the loop, ultimately destroying it. You have to be so convincing; you actually cause the opposite reaction. I know that does not make sense now, but, Max, you are the first one to do this. Time is a strange beast, as you know. If you are to be successful, you have to do what must be done.” His smile faded and was replaced with a look of sorrow.

“I will do anything I have to do to bring Chloe back. Like I said, I would die for her, no question. She did it for everyone else. She’s my hero, Bokor. She deserves to live.”

“Max, anything but your life. You have to promise me that much. If it looks like you won’t make it, you have to turn back, or whatever.” 

I can’t promise that, Chloe. This is where our story either begins again, or where mine ends.  

“Okay, then. Let us proceed. Do you want anything to drink or eat? It might be a while before you get to again.” The Voodoo Man stood and motioned towards the house, a toothy grin stretching the skin on his face.

“I’m ready now. I don’t want to waste even a single minute.” Max shook her head and took a deep breath then exhaled. Her hand naturally reached for her cigarettes, but she slowly lowered it without getting one. She realized she didn’t even want to smoke. The brunette sensed something inside of her was changing. Rather than snuffing out her emotions with nicotine and self-loathing as she had done for the better part of two years, she decided all of her energy needed to be in the moment.

“Close your eyes, Dearie.”

For you, Chloe. For me. For us. 

Max did as she was told.

An abrupt sensation of flying was replaced by a feeling of weightlessness. Despite keeping her eyes tightly shut, she could see an overwhelming bright, white light ahead of her. A continuous beeping tone started to sound in the distance, growing louder with each second.

Beep… 

Beep… 

Beep… 

Beep… 

Beep… 

Beep… 

“Did you just move?” a familiar voice whispered. “Max? Max!”

Suddenly, Max felt weak. Her body felt almost numb, and her eyes were heavy.

“Oh, shit. Max! You’re awake! Oh my god, finally!”

When she opened her eyes, she noticed a blurry hospital room. Looking down at her arms, she saw tubes and hoses attached to her at one end and different types of machinery at the other.

As her vision was improving, she glanced up towards the individual she had just heard.

“Uhh… huh?” She couldn’t believe who was looking back down at her. “What are y-you doing…” She was too feeble to continue. Her lips were dry and her breathing felt shallow.

“Shhh,” the blonde responded, briefly placing a pointer finger over Max’s lips. “Save your energy, I’ll get a nurse. Dammit, it’s good to have you back, Max. I missed you so much.”

“Wha-what’s happening?”

VICTORIA!?